Just Saying...

Just Saying...

How much character do I really need? Come on!

Posted: 17 May 2012 01:33 PM PDT

I have a mutual friend with The Douche. She recently blogged about their wedding and that she wouldn't be posting their photos, it wasn't her place to do so.

After running into her today, I thanked her for that, while trying not to get choked up on the spot. Cos it simply would have destroyed me. I've managed to never see them together in all the years we've been doing this on/off thing. I wasn't about to start with their wedding.

I'm still not 100% emotionally stable after our last conversation we had last week. A conversation I will never share with any of you. Not to mention all the other things in my life adding to that. It would have destroyed me, to a point of no return. In months to come, I'm sure I'll be fine to handle such pictures, but right now, not a chance. Ya I'm moving on with someone else, but that doesn't mean I can turn that light switch of feelings off. My heart isn't made of stone.

It's going to be a long year of changing jobs, cos I'm convinced I'll spend the rest of the year temping, and building character in other areas. I'm coming to the conclusion that I'm entering middle-age and a mid life crisis. Don't laugh, it's like a biological clock. You can't control this shit.

More recently I've decided that I do need to start seeing someone professionally again.  I don't want to hit rock bottom before I get there, and I'm only a few steps from the ledge.

Building friggin character.