Posted: 27 May 2012 05:11 PM PDT
I'm sure we've all been there. At the receiving end of being treated poorly by a friend.
My standards for how I treat my friends is high. In return, I expect the same. How you treat your friends says a lot about the kind of person you are.
An obvious rule:
If you treat your friends poorly or dismiss them, you can not expect them to be there for you, or support you in a time of need.
My best friend, as you know, is going thru all sorts of shit. In past week, she has said she'd call me. Last Tuesday. We text, but it's random stuff, not the important things that she should be following up on, in regards to her current situation. Pick any of the following excuses. Tired, busy, kids, homework, etc... then in almost in the same breath tells me all about how she's spent several hours into the wee hours of the morning, chatting with men from a certain dating site. But entirely too busy and/or tired to follow up on criminal court appearances etc.
Really? I put our shit back burner, support you thru the most dangerous time in your life, and you dismiss me to talk to random men you haven't even met? Yet, expect me to continue to be there offering support?
I get when we're mentally exhausted, we need fluff to unwind etc. Then don't say you'll call on a certain day, then blow it off like it was any casual conversation.
For any of you who know me in real life, I do not take my close friendships lightly. They are dear to me. I'm fiercely loyal and protective over those I love. So needless to say, it hurts and I'm exhausted, after putting myself out there to protect you, be supportive, only to be dismissed.
This has been the pattern for many many years. It's only been in the last few years, I've decided I've had enough of it. I've told her by email (cos I can't get her on the phone) how I feel etc. I'm mad. Get the priorties in order (family first, friends second, random men last!) It makes her word unrealible if I needed her in a time of need, cos her "I'm busy, tired, working etc", can no longer be taken for what it's worth, after telling me she was too busy to talk cos it was more important to talk to random men..
I couldn't imagine trying to justify someone elses upset if I blew them off to talk to random men, when I should be sharing the outcome of a criminal and custody case, while her life is in eminent danger.
No input needed. Just venting.
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